A Christmas Carol (the remix)

Ridiculously Ravishing Red Velvet Celebration Cake
Ridiculously Ravishing Red Velvet Celebration Cake

‘Twas the night before Christmas
As all of you know.
A time to be merry
And let go of woe.
I sat and I pondered
Of what I could make.
To bring you good cheer
And inspiration to bake.
A thing so delicious
And more-ish you see,
To leave for old Santa
Right under your tree.
I don’t advise this however,
And that’s just because
He’d love this red velvet
More than Mrs Clause!
Okay, enough banter,
Let’s get to the cake,
It looks complicated
But it’s easy to bake.
There’s some cocoa, some flour,
Some this and some that.
And let’s not forget
1/2 a Kg of white kit Kat.
And yes I said white,
Somewhere Julius is itching,
To throw his race card
Right at Baking & Bitching.
I think we’ll be lucky
He won’t be in touch.
Because Juju’s too busy,
Planning land-grabs and such.
So much chocolate sounds excessive,
Of this I’m aware.
But I can assure you,
It’s the greatest I swear!
There was sieving and beating
Some whipping and creaming,
For a cake so delicious
You’d swear that you’re dreaming.
And so, I do wish you,
A Christmas of cheer.
Full of food and good times,
Spent with those that are dear.
And may we remember,
the souls all at rest.
I hope there’s baked goods up there,
Or my dad won’t be impressed.
May your cakes always rise,
With icing between each layer.
May there be no Boney M C.D
Within your C.D player.
May you have luck that never leaves you,
And love that never ends.
May you always have good hair days
And somewhat average looking friends.
And now I’ll leave you to the cake…
I’m sure your taste buds are all twitching.
Merry Christmas to all of you legends
With love from Baking & Bitching.

This will be my final post for 2014. It’s been a wild ride to say the least. Thank you to everyone who has read, shared, baked and bitched with me over the last few months. You are the cherry on top and in the words of Hall & Oates, “You make my dreams come true!”

So for the last time in 2014, (all together now)

Yours in Baking & Bitching, (because “xoxo” was too mainstream)

Bronny Claus

A slice of the festive season
A slice of the festive season

Ridiculously Ravishing Red Velvet Celebration Cake

For the cake:
3 eggs, separated.
1 cup of Castor Sugar (divided in half)
1/2 cup of Milk
1/2 cup of Sunflower Oil
1 1/4 cup of Cake Flour
2 tablespoons of Cocoa Powder
1/3 small bottle of Red Food Colouring
1 teaspoon of Vanilla Extract
2 teaspoons of Baking Powder

For the frosting:
250g Cream Cheese (at room temp)
1 tablespoon of Butter (softened)
600g Icing Sugar

For the decorations:
500g White Kitkat (3 family sized slabs + 1 standard four finger pack)
2 bags of mixed Chuckles or White Malteasers
Edible glitter
Half a meter of Christmas ribbon

For the cake:
1. Preheat oven to 180 degrees Celsius.
2. Separate the eggs. Put the yolks into a mixing bowl and the whites into a glass bowl.
3. To the yolks, add 1/2 a cup of castor sugar and the milk and oil. Beat together.
4. Add the vanilla and red food colouring and whisk well.
5. Sieve in the flour, cocoa and baking powder and whisk well.
6. With an electric mixer, beat eggs until stiff peaks start to form and add the remaining 1/2 cup castor sugar, beating until thick and glossy.
7. Loosen egg yolk mix with a big dollop of egg whites before folding in the rest of the whites with a large metal spoon.
8. Spoon into two 18cm cake tins and bake for 18 mins, or until a skewer comes out clean.
9. Allow to cool.
10. When totally cooled, combine all the icing ingredients with an electric mixer.
11. Sandwich two layers together with some of the icing and cover the entire cake.
12. Place fingers of Kitkat side by side around the entire cake. Place Chuckles or Malteasers on top of cake.
13. Top with edible glitter.
14. Tie ribbon around the Kitkat, aiming for the middle of the fingers.

Health Hack: Don’t be a Grinch, go all out this Christmas. There’s always the new year…

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